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Saturday, November 29, 2008

PETA Members: MUST READ!

(click for larger image)

This is what I just pulled out of my oven. I think I will eat the left-wing first.

Toss my salad, PETA bitchez.

The only thing that sucked about this is that I didn't get to strangle or shoot the terrified turkey myself. I think it would be pretty awesome to throw one of these squawking birds into the boiling water while alive, and watch the feathers fly while listing to Die Motherfuckers by the Geto Boys.

Deer meat is even better than turkey.

There is nothing I like better than popping a deer slug in an unsuspecting doe's head while she is sipping from a brook: SPLAT! PWND!, and watching the brains leak out of her shattered skull.

After we cut her up for meat, we make a xylophone out of the ribcage, a drum out of the skull (drum sticks made out of leg bones), and we use her intestines for violin and bass strings.

Then we sit around the campfire eating deer meat, faces adorned with deer blood as face-paint, playing songs with instruments made out of deer bones and guts... great fun!

(Kidding aside, this is a roasted turkey I cooked tonight)

Read this, It will make you a better person

MEME: Five Ways Blogging Has Changed Me

OG tagged me. This meme was begun by L. L. Barkat. The rules are as follows:

1. Write about 5 specific ways blogging has affected you, either positively or negatively.
2. link back to the person who tagged you
3. link back to this parent post (LL says she's "not so much interested in generating links, but rather in tracking the meme so I can perhaps do a summary post later on that looks at patterns and interesting discoveries.")
4. tag a few friends or five, or none at all
5. post these rules— or just have fun breaking them

Five ways blogging has changed my life:

1: I have become much better at writing, composition, spelling, etc.

2: My faith in humanity has been seriously diminished. Every time a read an idiotic post or comment on my or somebody's blog, I just shake my head and wonder about the future of humanity.

3: My faith in humanity has been significantly increased. Every time I read an insightful post or comment on my or somebody's blog, I nod my head and smile, and think that maybe, just maybe, we have a chance.

4. I have met many new people worth knowing (including left-wingers) that I otherwise would have never known or communicated with, and has allowed me to troll morans that I would have otherwise not have had an opportunity to troll.

5. It has reaffirmed my belief that I am smarter than anyone I have ever met, online or in person.

Read this, It will make you a better person

Friday, November 28, 2008

Opinion: America Deserves Blame for Asteroid Impact

by Sam D. Deouchbegg
VNN-November 28, 2008


The recent impact of a large asteroid and subsequent destruction of a large area of Spain is a direct result of the Iraq war and the failed policies of the Bush administration. This is yet another 1,000,000 corpses that you can lay at the feet of Uncle Sam.

Preposterous you say? If you consider that Amerikkka has spent over $600 BILLION dollars on the Iraq War and the so-called “war on terror,” and less than $100 billion dollars on NASA since 2003, it would stand to reason that had that money been redirected to a program dedicated to the detection and destruction of NEOs or Near Earth Objects, asteroids that intersect the orbit of the planet, this tragedy could have easily been prevented. Its official: George W. Bush is now worse than Hitler.

Had Barack Obama been in office, this tragedy would have never happened. Nasa and the U.S. Military would have been well equipped to stop the asteroid, instead of being used to torture carpet merchants and carpet-bomb women and children.

And had NASA failed, Obama could have stopped the asteroid himself, with fireballs from his eyes, and bolts of lightning from his arse.

Samuel D. Deouchbegg is a professor of political science at UCLA Berkley, and author of the New York Times best-selling book Amerikkka the Evil: Reclaiming Trinity from Capitalism

Read this, It will make you a better person

Brisbane Storm, 11/16/08

Here is a series of videos from the monster supercell that ravished Brisbane on the 16th:






Posted on Stormtrack.org.

Here are some more:






Read this, It will make you a better person

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Suicide is Brainless

Tonight, I cooked up some taco-meat for a couple of taco-dinners next week. I also cooked up a couple of pork cutlets so I can have them for lunch on Monday, to go along with some Vermont extra-sharp white cheddar, green olives, and parmesan garlic Triscuits. I think I will add some smoked sliced turkey to the mix as well.

I have a ½ a French silk pie in my fridge that I am slowly eating on.

It smells so good in here right now, with the braised pork mixed with ground beef and taco seasoning. I have a large apple cider candle burning to help mask my cigarette smoke, and two Glade Plug-Ins; one spewing apple-cinnamon, the other French vanilla.

Earlier this evening, I enjoyed sushi with my best friend, accompanied by his brother and sister-in-law, and we had a great time.

On the way home, I picked up a new video game to play. Tomorrow, I’m going to help a friend fix his car. And on Monday, I will go to work and do my job.

I have two dates lined up, and I might even get laid this week, and both chicks are pretty hot. I love being alive.

And I’m starting to get Led Zeppelin’s Over the Hills and Far Away down to where I can play it fairly well, and this is a source of great pleasure for me.

Given all this in any given week, I have a very hard time trying to understand why this putz would commit suicide on a live cam.

I just don’t understand suicide. Oh, I have seen many videos of people killing themselves; I still can not understand the WHY.

Yeah, if you are in chronic great pain, I can see the desire. But if you are just a fucked up teenager that’s mad at your parents… well fuck you. Society doesn’t need your ass anyway.

You had nothing, NOTHING that is worth living for, you useless hack? Do you have any idea how much you have cost the local government and your family to dispose of your rotting husk, which is now even more useless than before?

Fuck it. Suicide is Darwinism, and I won’t shed a tear for these people that kill themselves.

Read this, It will make you a better person

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Attractive Girls Union Refuses To Enter Into Talks With Mike Greenman

Friday, November 21, 2008

Science Fail: Breathalyzers are Racist, Says Defense Lawyer

This lawyer sites some obscure unnamed study that claims Blacks have a 3% lower lung capacity than whites. Ergo, breathalyzers are racist.

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I suppose this is why Caucasians dominate the running events at the Olympics every year.

Anyway, while the devices that measure BAC can be faulty, the science behind them is not.

Alcohol doesn't digest-it's absorbed into the bloodstream directly, and must be processed by the liver or exhaled, and that takes time.

Have you ever drank so much (MoD, I'm looking at you) that the next day after your wake up, your breath STILL smells like booze? There is a reason for that. Ethanol is being leeched out of your blood when you exhale. It doesn't matter how many Altoids your suck or how much tea you drink. You can only expel the ethanol as fast as your liver and lungs will allow.

These devices measure how much air you are expelling, and what percentage of that air is vaporized ethanol. Sure if you took a drink or drank some NyQuil minutes before you took the test, the results may be skewed upwards. But the end result ain't because of racism.

Read this, It will make you a better person

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

The Conservative and the Liberal



This is an accurate representation of the political blogosphere.

Read this, It will make you a better person

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Al Gore-Linked Group Made an "Error" When They Said October 2008 Was The Hottest on Record

Poppycock! A political figure would never lie to scare the public in order to advance an agenda, and they would certainly never do so in the pursuit of profits.

What's funny is that neither side realizes that both are promoting the culture of fear, while at the same time, criticizing the other side of fear-mongering. With the Right, it's terrorism, and with the Left, it's global warming.

And useful idiots on both sides are willing to go out and spread their respective messages to the unthinking masses. *spits*

Anyway, the article from The Telegraph:
A surreal scientific blunder last week raised a huge question mark about the temperature records that underpin the worldwide alarm over global warming. On Monday, Nasa's Goddard Institute for Space Studies (GISS), which is run by Al Gore's chief scientific ally, Dr James Hansen, and is one of four bodies responsible for monitoring global temperatures, announced that last month was the hottest October on record.

This was startling. Across the world there were reports of unseasonal snow and plummeting temperatures last month, from the American Great Plains to China, and from the Alps to New Zealand. China's official news agency reported that Tibet had suffered its "worst snowstorm ever". In the US, the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration registered 63 local snowfall records and 115 lowest-ever temperatures for the month, and ranked it as only the 70th-warmest October in 114 years.

So what explained the anomaly? GISS's computerised temperature maps seemed to show readings across a large part of Russia had been up to 10 degrees higher than normal. But when expert readers of the two leading warming-sceptic blogs, Watts Up With That and Climate Audit, began detailed analysis of the GISS data they made an astonishing discovery. The reason for the freak figures was that scores of temperature records from Russia and elsewhere were not based on October readings at all. Figures from the previous month had simply been carried over and repeated two months running.

Read this, It will make you a better person

Friday, November 14, 2008

Tommy’s Eazy Guide for Filtering Political Blog Posts

As somebody that reads political news from the entire range of the Blogosphere, I have learned a few things about how to ignore posts that are kooky, and have created a self-filter:
A. Ignore headlines that contain a word or words in all caps:
(Bush Is Trying To STEAL Our MONEY!)

B. Ignore headlines that end in one or more exclamation points:
(Bush Is Trying To Steal Our Money!!!!)

C. Ignore headlines with pejorative neologisms:
(Bushitler and the Rethuglicans are stealing our money!)

D. Ignore headlines that contain adverbs such as ‘desperately’, ‘frantically’, ‘furiously’:
(Bushitler is desperately covering up for the CIA’s roll in 9/11!)

E. Ignore headlines that contain ‘lie’, ‘lies’, 'lied', or ‘lying’:
(Bushitler LIED about WMDs, and is FRANTICALLY covering up for 9/11!)
Follow these rules and you might, MIGHT, get a nugget of truth.

Read this, It will make you a better person

Saturday, November 08, 2008

TED-Mena Trott: How blogs are building a friendlier world

Obama Won! (and we lost)

My tribute to the new Tsar:


Read this, It will make you a better person

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Obama Win Causes Obsessive Supporters To Realize How Empty Their Lives Are

Sunday, November 02, 2008

Mr. T Selling the Flavor Wave



"I pity the fool that tries to get this down!"

Read this, It will make you a better person

SNL Rips on Keith Olbermann



I am mildly surprised that "Red" Ben Affleck did this, and even more surprised that NBC (National Barack Central) aired it.

Read this, It will make you a better person

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Ummm....

Big Brother Has Arrived

Ice T Ft. Ice Cube - Trespass

Ice-T New Jack Hustler