Some Thoughts I Had Today

By Tommy-T

Marriage is a wounded, bleeding corps on the battlefield of the sexes. Somebody needs to come along and give it the coup de gras.

Why do people think they are so goddamned important?

A world war is going to be fought over oil by 2015.

This season is the last chance for several years that the Chiefs have to win a Super Bowl.

Why is it that every woman that I am interested in, or visa/versa, turns out to be a hedonistic degenerate, insane or both?

Smoking DOES NOT cause lung cancer. Period.

If there is to be a nuclear war, I will not bravely “stand there and let one hit me,” no! I will cower in the deepest bunker I can find and survive. Goddamn, remember Fallout and Fallout 2? Shit, I’m gonna be the Vault Dweller, The Road Warrior...yeah that would be the shit…

It would suck to have Ebola.

Must I do ALL the thinking for the entire human race?

Damn…that bitch needs to come over to the dark side so I can show her the true power of the force.

The damn space shuttle is not going to disintegrate because of a 1” piece of padding sticking out between the tiles.

Black people and white people need to stop walking on egg shells when they talk to each other. It should be a law that everybody has to tell a racial joke to somebody not of their race once per day.

I should be President of the World.

If we were capable of inter-stellar travel, would we bother contacting primitive alien cultures?

Its 2005, where is my flying car? Where is by robo-maid? What year was “Runaway” supposed to take place in?

America should team up with Russia and take out the Chinese before it’s too late. Fuck them; I can buy my clothes from the ROK or Indonesia.

I love summertime in KC... It’s hot and humid, and the women are… dressing accordingly. ‘Cept for Japan, per-capita the best looking women in the world live in KC.

-Tommy Masterson